Woolshed dancing petition: ‘I want to get my hoe back on’
PASSIONATE supporters of tabletop dancing have urged one of the Cairns most popular nightclubs to bring back the boogie benches - and they make a colourful argument.
The Cairns Post yesterday revealed the owners of The Woolshed had been forced to remove its iconic tables due to tightened insurance restrictions.
A wave of anguish washed over the city like the Great Flood when news of the benches eviction spread - even prompting an online petition calling for the Woolshed to "bring back the tables".
That appeal has so far attracted more than 160 supporters.
They included one passionate nightclubber who spoke for us all when she declared: "I want to get my hoe back on."
Other petitioners declared the tables "f***ing iconic", a "Cairns icon" and "awesome".
Someone lamented that the "shed of dreams" would never be the same, while another ardent supporter simply proclaimed: "My name Jeff."
The decision to remove the tables after 25 years was not taken lightly.
Woolshed owner Dominic Davies told the Cairns Post he was simply no longer able to secure insurance for the venue unless the tables got the boot.
Their replacements - purpose-built raised dancing platforms - are roughly the same height as the tables but for some reason do not trigger the same Pavlovian wince among potential insurers.
The Woolshed is far from alone when it comes to red tape struggles.
Deloitte Access Economics has found privately owned businesses are being choked by red-tape - as well as their own overzealous rule-making.
The Get out of your own way: Unleashing productivity report calculated the cost of complying with rules and regulations at $250 billion annually across the private and public sectors in Australia.
Mr Davies has guaranteed punters would still have a brilliant time at his club, with the groove platforms sure to be packed to the brim again tonight.