$2M PLUS: The 5 most luxurious homes on the market
WHEN it comes to property, there is probably no better person than I - a lifetime renter - to run the rule over five of the Coffs Coast's most expensive homes.
Because what I may not know about adequate insulation and furniture not made out of milk crates, I more than make up for with my knowledge of helipads and 250-year-old Indonesian doors.
So here are just a few examples of what more than $2 million will get you around the region.
The Hitchcock penthouse - Coffs Harbour - $3,950,000
Nothing says 'I've made it to the top' than by literally living out your life at the top of an apartment building.
The four-bed, three bathroom penthouse located at 5/71 Hood St takes up the entire top two floors, meaning the days of having to share your rooftop terrace are over!
Finally you can enjoy those 360 degree views of the ocean, mountains and your neighbours in peace and quiet.
Pair this place with a broken leg, a decent lens and an inquisitive nature and you have the recipe for a Hitchcock classic.
The driver's dream - Mullaway - $3,500,000
With so many houses these days suffering from a lack of parking, the age-old quandary of which of your Jags are you going to sell to fit them all in is sadly all too real.
Well wipe away those tears folks because this spectacular coastal property on 99 Mullaway Drive boasts not one, not two, but 12 carparking spaces, making this the perfect property for the indecisive.
And if luxury cars aren't your thing, perhaps its unique headland location will tickle your fancy as this six-bedroom delight would have to be one of the best situated homes on the coast.
The fast getaway - Coffs Harbour - $2,100,000
As anyone prepping for the zombie apocalypse knows, having the ability to 'bug-out', or leave quickly, is critical. Which is why having a designated helipad is such a big plus these days.
So look no further than 91 Gatelys Road, a perfect combination of elegance and cold-blooded necessity complete with helipad, two granny flats and a 50,000-litre water tank connected to a bore.
Perched high above the town and nestled in the Great Dividing Range (almost), this 10 acre property will ensure you survive well into the new world order.
The play school favourite - Sapphire Beach - $2,470,000
For anyone who used to yell at the television in a vain attempt to get Noni Hazelhurst to choose the 'round window' during ABC's Play School, this is the home for you.
With at least five round windows throughout this striking property at 3 Beachfront Close, an investment may well save you money on those psychoanalyst fees.
This home is truly unique in its design, with the final product leaving no doubt the architects were given some creative freedom to create something special.
The top of the range - Sapphire Beach - $4,499,000
Recently featured in the Coffs Coast Advocate, Villa Kopai isn't just one for those who want to be able to say "I bought the most expensive house on the Coffs Coast".
It's for the silent majority who have a penchant for 250-year-old doors imported from Indonesia and water features that are inside, rather than outside the house.
With other, more practical features like six bathrooms, a gym and a sauna the property at 14 Beachfront Close is clearly one-of-a-kind.